For someone living very close to one of the largest shopping centres in the UK, this is fantastic :-)

Mr Tomkins on Christmas

Now what shall I give up in order to feast?

Mums love Iceland

Now I know that people from Iceland are a little strange. I have known this since seeing the Sugarcubes and Bjork on Top of the Pops. As I understand, it has something to do with the very cold weather, the unusually long and dark winters (summers are long and light) and the general feeling that the island could explode with volcanic activity and send them all to a hot/cold death.

What I didn't expect was for the weirdness to extend itself to rudeness by the managers of one of their shops in Bletchley. Instead of explaining to us in a 'customer service' manner that they were unable to do something and apologising for any inconvenience caused. He stood there simply saying 'no' as if it was our fault and our causing - this the manager (Tom Peters would be turning in his grave if he was dead).

However, I now know the reason why 'Mums love Iceland' as Kerry Katona tells us in the advert. It is quite obvious really when you think about it. It must be because all women love to be treated badly.

So did we walk out, upset and vowing never to return? Of course not, they had some very good deals on.

50 worst artists in Music at Blender

This has nothing to do with Milton Keynes, although if someone included Milton Keynes in one of their songs it may help to get on this list.*

The 50 worst artists in music

You'll agree with some (most? unless you like this sort of rubbish and some obviously do [did] as they have sold shedloads of CDs), disagree with some (come on Japan? They were voted most missed act two years in succession by the readers of Smash Hits - a discerning bunch of readers if ever there was) and laugh at most of it.

A fun list to spend a few minutes.

*If this has been done I'd like to know

Social highlight of the year

This time next week it will all be over. The social event of the year will once again be a memory, filing itself in my little neurons, in my little brain. Last year's social event of the year has been filed in a similar way to the Plans for the Hyperspace Bypass that destroyed the earth in Douglas Adam's Hitchiker's Guide to the Galaxy, so as never to resurface again. Just thinking about it brings me out in a cold sweat.

Next Tuesday evening is our annual Christmas meal. I almost said party but that would be stretching the truth too far, still, I live in hope that this year's event will not lead me to seek therapy - lasy year's Slade impression was too much to take (the memory is leaking out, need to change the subject).

There has been no record of polonium-210 being found in Milton Keynes so far. Tests have been carried out by MK council at the Starbucks in Midsummer Place. But after extensive downing of Mocha, Cappu and Stone Chinos, no trace of the radioactive substance that killed Alexander Litvinenko* has been found.

*Interesting that not many blogs contain the former Russian spy's name. Too hard to spell is my personal view - but it doesn't take too much trawling to find it at the BBC.

It's a mystery

Now you know I'm not talking about Toyah because there wasn't any semblance of a lisp in the title. However, there is a mystery in our house. A strange smell was coming from under the sink and so it was felt that we should investigate the sink.

We did

After taking off the u-bend we found a slight blockage caused by a small painting brush. Now which young son member of the household uses small brushes to paint his miniature models? A brush can't accidentally get flushed down a sink, it needs to be held upright and dropped.

I haven't been well and french markets

Nope, I have had another case of man-flu. And this really was/is man-flu because I haven't got any medicine from the doctor. However, I have been browsing the internet and I found Wednesday 22nd November post over on Jonny B's site that brought a smile to my face - it seems he has had the lurgee too, although it wasn't that which brought the smile to my face.

It seems they have a 'French Market' in Norfolk too. We have one in Milton Keynes every so often, although since our car broke I haven't been able to get to the city centre as much as I would like and have probably missed this years event. In fact the Christmas market is probably there already and that is normally German.

Oxford Street Christmas Lights Campaign

Following on from my previous post about Ariel washing up powder and missing the point. I would like to put my full backing behind Dave Walker's Oxford Street Christmas Light campaign. Let's make every little effort, and there are also side effects of benefit too - less All Saints!

Cartoon by Dave Walker. Join the Oxford Street Christmas Lights Campaign at the Cartoon Blog.

What makes a face funny, what makes you laugh

Take a quick look at this from the BBC.

I am sorry to point this out to the people who did this study but they have failed to take any notice of what actually makes people funny and what makes other laugh. Let me help a little here, it has something to do with 'being' funny. They say chiseled jaw and high forehead aren't funny, but feminine features are. Excuse me, but have these people never heard of Tommy Cooper or John Cleese? I mean surely they must have, especially Cleese, after all I'm sure some of those involved were students, and the Parrot sketch is still required reading in further education.

Oh dear, I mean what have scientists ever done for us?

Dust off the leather jacket and hit the train station

I am off to the Cardiacs in a little while, so goodbye.

Ariel, energy saving and climate change

I am all for trying to save energy and therefore save the planet from its global warming calamity. Therefore when I watched the new Ariel washing powder advertisement on TV (those commercial channels not the very good and wonderful BBC - I slipped) I was very pleased.

There new washing powder washes just as well at 30 degrees as it does at 40 degrees... wonderful. The advert continues to tell us that if we all wash at 30 degrees it could save copious amounts of energy, in fact a 10 degree reduction can save up to 40% energy. This is fantastic, we can all save that much energy.

However, they then spoil it all by suggesting that energy can be used to light up to 1000 villages. Sorry, but I thought the point of saving energy was that you didn't use it.

Take a look at the current Ariel campaign here, and you can view the advert here.